Debunking Common Myths About Bisexuality

Sexuality is a complex and personal aspect of who we are, and for many people, it can evolve over time. However, the myths and misconceptions surrounding bisexuality often oversimplify this experience, leading to misunderstandings and harmful stereotypes. These myths not only invalidate the experiences of bisexual people but also contribute to a culture of erasure and discrimination. By addressing these misconceptions, we can better understand the reality of bisexuality, acknowledge the fluidity of sexual identity, and challenge the stereotypes that persist.

Myth #1 - “It’s just a phase”

Truth: Bisexuality is a valid identity!

One of the most pervasive and inaccurate myths around bisexuality is that it is just a passing phase–something people grow out once they “decide” they are gay or straight. This myth invalidates the experiences of countless bi folks and perpetuates the idea that sexuality is something that can be chosen or changed. Being bi is a valid sexual orientation like any other and is an integral part of who someone is. It is not a temporary stage or confusion about their sexuality. 

Myth #2 - “Bi people are more likely to cheat”

Truth: There is no evidence bi people are more likely to cheat.

This is a misconception and stereotype surrounding the bi community, when in reality there is no evidence that bi people are more likely to cheat than any other sexual orientation. Cheating is not inherently linked to someone’s sexuality. This comes from the stereotype that bi folks are more promiscuous and/or less committed in relationships due to being attracted to multiple genders. It is also linked to Myth #1, believing that bi people are confused and therefore “torn” between genders. Like anyone else, bi folks are capable of being in committed, monogamous relationships. 

Myth #3 - “Bi folks are always into threesomes”

Truth: Bi folks are not a fetish! A sexual orientation and attraction does not mean you automatically are interested in having sex with someone. 

The idea that being bisexual inherently means someone wants or enjoys threesomes is not only untrue but also reductive and dismissive of the complexity of bisexuality. Being bi means attraction to more than one gender, but does not mean that a person is automatically interested in engaging in sex acts like a threesome. Some may, some may not. This is further connected to the idea that bi folks are more promiscuous and desire multiple partners. This belief reduces bisexuality to a set of expectations around sexual behaviors and fetishizes bi folks. It often results in others viewing bi folks as a means to fulfill a fantasy, rather than a whole complex human. 

Myth #4 - “Bi people are in denial”

Truth: Bisexuality is a distinct identity, not just a halfway point.

Bisexuality is just as real as being straight or gay, and it’s not indicative of confusion or denial. The idea that bisexual people are "in denial" about their sexuality stems from the outdated and incorrect belief that people should be either straight or gay, and anything else is just a step toward one of those two options. While it is true that some people may experience fluidity in their sexual orientation over time, this fluidity doesn’t mean they were "in denial" before—it just means that sexuality can evolve and change over the course of a person’s life. For bisexual folks, their attraction to multiple genders may always be part of their identity, but their experiences, relationships, and emotional connections may evolve over time. Bisexual people do not need to "choose" one side over the other for their identity to be legitimate. This pressure is rooted in heteronormative thinking—the idea that there are only two genders and that attraction should be neatly classified into one of two categories: gay or straight. This mentality ignores the fact that bisexuality is not about being "half" of one thing and "half" of another—it’s about being authentically attracted to more than one gender. Bisexuality is a full, complete orientation in its own right, and bisexual people should not feel compelled to "choose" between two options just to satisfy society’s binary expectations.

Myth #5 - “You aren’t really bi if you’ve never been with ____”

Truth: A bi person is still bi, regardless of the gender of their current partner or past relationships.

Bisexual people are attracted to both people of their own gender and people of other genders. Regardless of the gender of their partner, their identity still stays the same. A bi person’s sexual behavior or partners doesn’t dictate their orientation. If a bi woman is with a man, that doesn’t make her straight in the same way that a bi woman with a woman doesn’t make her a lesbian. A bi person can be attracted to a gender regardless of having sexual or relationship experience with them. This myth contributes to the erasure of bisexual identities. It implies that if someone has not had a particular experience, they aren’t truly bisexual. This kind of thinking can make bisexual people feel invalidated or pressured to "prove" their sexuality to others, which isn’t fair and can lead to internalized confusion and shame.

The myths surrounding bisexuality are not just misleading but can also harm the bi community, creating unnecessary stigma and confusion. It’s important to recognize that while sexual identity may be fluid for some people, bisexuality is a valid, independent orientation in its own right. Understanding the truth behind these misconceptions helps create a more inclusive and respectful environment for everyone, regardless of their sexual orientation. Let’s continue to challenge outdated stereotypes and support bisexual folks in living authentically and confidently, without fear of judgment or invalidation.