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In reality TV land, an ultimatum makes for great drama: “Commit to me or lose me.” But in actual queer relationships, where vulnerability, identity, and power dynamics already run deep, ultimatums don’t work the way we wish they would.

Today, I want to get into the difference between emotional expression and emotional attack — and why learning the difference is the key to actually getting more of what you want out of your relationship (instead of slowly poisoning it because your sadness is wearing a bulletproof vest and your anger is wielding a knife).

Healing happens in the presence of emotionally responsive and caring relationships. Reclaim your time, your energy, and your sense of self.

Choosing yourself in the face of dysfunction isn’t just self-preservation; it’s an act of quiet rebellion against a system that demanded you

I often start sessions by saying to my clients, "so tell me about you, what's been going on?" As I start this blog post, I find myself...